24 Oct 2011

Contest: Win a Honey Badger Rashguard (size Large)


Good people of the world, this is my very last pre-production Honey Badger rashguard. It's a size LARGE. You want it? Do I give a sh*t? Of course I do. So to win this last ever pre-production rashie (final production version is a little different with added logos etc) here are the details:

TO ENTER
The artwork on this rashguard has been subject to intense debate with people either loving it or hating. I want you to play devil's advocate and write - as a comment on this blog entry - the most creatively venomous 'review' of the rashguard as you can. No profanities please, I want clever but naaaasty critique. Make it mean, make it deadly, make me laugh out loud.

Comment here on this blog, not Facebook. Please include your full name and location, but if you want to avoid spambots, then leave out your email address and just keep an eye on here when I announce the winner and you can contact me by email or Facebook with your mailing details.

Entries close on WEDNESDAY 26th October midnight BST - a winner announced the next day.

Judges decision (ie me) is final. Remember the prize is one size LARGE long sleeved rashie.


DON'T FORGET
Pre-order for this baby ends on Monday 31st October (conveniently end of month payday, yay!)
You can buy it through these retailers:

UK - Tatami Fightwear

USA - Budovideos
Germany - Gi Direkt
Sweden - TatamiBJJ SE
Finland - MESH
Japan - BT Fightgear

Good luck!


:)

About the Author

Meerkatsu

Author & Artist

Meerkatsu is the artist name for BJJ black belt Seymour Yang.

42 comments:

SF said...

Who made this design a 8 year old girl? Look at the colors who in their right mnd would have chosen that color combo. And come on now 2 2 headed cobras i thought i saw something like that on nickelodean called cat dog one end cat one end dog what is this a honey badger with cobra cobra times 2. there should have been blood trickling out of the badgers mouth all i can figure is the designer forgot to put hearts around the badger. it looks like a kitten carring a chew toy it needed to look like the badger ripping apart the cobras but hey i didnt design it i just want to win it so you have it

SF said...

Who made this design a 8 year old girl? Look at the colors who in their right mnd would have chosen that color combo. And come on now 2 2 headed cobras i thought i saw something like that on nickelodean called cat dog one end cat one end dog what is this a honey badger with cobra cobra times 2. there should have been blood trickling out of the badgers mouth all i can figure is the designer forgot to put hearts around the badger. it looks like a kitten carring a chew toy it needed to look like the badger ripping apart the cobras but hey i didnt design it i just want to win it so you have it

Andy Singleton said...

'The Honey Badger' rashguard..It looks like the drunken love child of the Purple Power Ranger outfit and an Ed Hardy t-shirt!

graham cooke said...

Honey Badger Rashguard review: Normally a review of a piece of clothing would talk about the comfort and fitting of the garment as well as it's aesthetic. With this particular rashguard, we cannot even get to the wearing of it as Liberace himself would never something so disgustingly in your face and camp as this monstrosity. This rashguard has absolutely no redeeming qualitites and even if it was fitted with a magical device that bestows the wearer with the grappling prowess of a thousand Marcelo Garcias could I envisage any right minded grappler wearing one.

The graphics, oh dear god the graphics! Remember the double rainbow guy? He cried at the beauty of a double rainbow, a strong reaction to a majestic work of art by mother nature herself. This design would make mother nature want to gouge out her own eyeballs with a spoon: "OH MY GOD DOUBLE COBRA ALL ACROSS THE RASHGUARD".

The graphic designer (if you could call him such a thing) behind this ghastly abomination has named it the honey badger rashguard, but the honey badger is about the last thing you notice on the garment. The honey badger is indeed a fierce animal and in an animal version of the ADCC - the honey badger would probably be the champion in his weight class. But the double cobra and the ostentatious use of purple reduce the badger to having the look of a terrified creature trapped in one of elton johns stage costumes and desparately trying to escape.

If anyone has the intention of approaching the designer with a view to making a purchase, I would advise they check themselves in for urgent brain examinations with a medical professional as soon as possible!

I have done some research into the psychological properties of colours and for my final word on this item of clothing and indeed as a warning to any customers who are ill enough to wish to part with their hard-earned money for this garbage, I will quote an article I found on the subject:
"Excessive use of purple can bring about too much introspection and the wrong tone of it communicates something cheap and nasty, faster than any other colour."

I rest my case.

stoojitsu said...

Honey badger rashie....... well well well here it is, meerkatsu's new creation, the honey badger "rashit".... looking at the colour scheme of purple and brown, its clear to see, whilst coming up with the concept he was chomping on a cadburys dairymilk....the finished article looks like it was passed onto the drum playing gorilla, the drumsticks replaced with paintbrushes and Phil Collins swapped for slipknot. he decided to have the epic honey badger, a fantastic idea, but then ruined it completely by adding the naff 2 2headed cobras strangely in the shape of an hour glass, clearly a reference to the lasting appeal of the hideous rashit. I'm hoping I win as it will be very luxurious bog roll :)

Marie said...

The Honey Badger Rashguard – Putting aside the eye-bleeding color choices, and a design aesthetic that would make first year design students call it “unrestrained”, its worst feature is that it showcases a mascot so bold and cutting edge that it is the choice of b-grade actresses and Perez Hilton. http://fitperez.com/2011-07-06-olivia-wilde-leaving-gym-in-honey-badger-shirt#.TqVriZsoFDU

Yeah, fearsome.

graham cooke said...

hmmmm some typos in my review: Can I resubmit:

Honey Badger Rashguard review: Normally a review of a piece of clothing would talk about the comfort and fitting of the garment as well as it's aesthetic. With this particular rashguard, we cannot even get to the wearing of it, as Liberace himself would never adorn himself with something so disgustingly in your face and camp as this monstrosity. This rashguard has absolutely no redeeming qualitites and never, even if it was fitted with a magical device that bestows the wearer with the grappling prowess of a thousand Marcelo Garcias, could I envisage any right minded grappler wearing one.

The graphics, oh dear god the graphics! Remember the double rainbow guy? He cried at the beauty of a double rainbow: A strong reaction to a majestic work of art by mother nature herself. This design would make mother nature want to gouge out her own eyeballs with a spoon screaming "OH MY GOD DOUBLE COBRA ALL ACROSS THE RASHGUARD".

The graphic designer (if you could call him such a thing) behind this ghastly abomination has named it the honey badger rashguard, but the badger is about the last thing you notice on the garment. The honey badger is indeed a fierce animal and, in an animal version of the ADCC, he would probably be the champion in his weight class. But the double cobra and the ostentatious use of purple reduce the poor badger to having the look of a terrified creature trapped in one of Elton Johns stage costumes, desperately trying to escape.

If anyone has the intention of approaching the designer with a view to making a purchase, I would advise they check themselves in for urgent brain examinations with a medical professional as soon as possible!

I have done some research into the psychological properties of colours and for my final word on this item of clothing and indeed as a warning to any customers who are ill enough to wish to part with their hard-earned money for this garbage, I will quote an article I found on the subject:
"Excessive use of purple can bring about too much introspection and the wrong tone of it communicates something cheap and nasty, faster than any other colour."

I rest my case

Volkodav said...

What is this, a new Power Rangers uniform? Duo Cobra ranger power up!!! What's up with the badger head floating in the middle like a cat from Alice in wonderland? Is this a grappling rash guard or a kindergarten Halloween costume. My 5 year old cousin would thing the colors are too girlly.
Now, are the brown underarms meant for sever sweat production or as intimidation to opponents implying that it smells like Snookie's skid marked underwear after Jersey shore?
And c'mon, 4 cobra heads... I thought we were over Karate Kid's cobra Kai nemesis long time ago and have established that a Crane stance only works in purple belt and above decision as a diversion for a flying reverse super secret wax off pinky hold.

shane burkhardt1 said...

Normally mma prototype gear would be considered a hot commodity. Demanding at least twice the value of it's store version on ebay,etc...Not with the Honey Badger rash guard! Like the video...no one gives a s#&%. The idiot who TRIED to design this abortion apparently cant do anything right. The design is so piss poor that the garbage men actually refuse to take it. This poor looser has created a fake contest to get rid of this hideous garment. The only reason I entered is because I thought I could use this so called rash guard to clean my car off with. Im now having doubts if even that is a sufficient use. To think that one of my neighbors would see me using such a horrible rag could cause permanent embarrassment in the community. For those of you who have not seen the HB rash guard be grateful! The design is soooo bad it gives you vertigo even looking at it. The Honey Badger apparently is a fierce animal. However the designer used the ugliest color purple possible. Making its appearance as fierce and manly as the commentator of the infamous HB youtube video! The graphic of the supposive HB is also horrendous! It looks like a flattened skunk that has become a road kill victim. Skunk is the perfect animal since the whole conceptual design stinks! And lets not forget the lame cobras. Seriously...using the 1980's GI joe Cobra logo would have looked cooler. All of this considered this rash guard would probably make a great dish rag if it actually functions. But considering the terrible marketing ploys of the design team it probably wont do that either. Save yourself some money and the beatings you will receive for wearing this and buy something designed from a real mma apparel company! There is hope for the poor looser who invented this though. Apparently after squandering his family's money investing in such a horrible project,not to mention embarrassing them to the point that they entered the witness protection program, he was hired on by another mma apparel company. Apparently they will have him come up with a design and marketing idea from his delusional mind. Then the actual design staff will do completely the opposite and actually make an impressive rash guard that appears to the masses. Thank God this catastrophic experiment is over! On line support groups are now forming for those who have suffered due to exposure to the product. You may reach the HB support group at sburkhardt1@hotmail.com

Spínola said...

Man, and i thought staph infection looked bad...

Michelle said...

The Honey badger doesn't give a s**t, which is obvious in his rash guard design!!!!! Don't give a s**t, looks like s**t and feels like s**T!!!!!!!!!!

Dan said...

Let us be honest here. This is just a poor man’s Raspberry Ape! Who in turn is just a poor man’s Rubber Bandido and he doesn’t even have his own t-shirt!!! So, there is the first problem with this truly appalling rash guard, the Honey Badger is just not deserving of a design!

I have heard that a Honey Badger can rip large mammals apart with only its claws and a garden rake but this honey badger looks like he’d barely be able to rip a pack of Love Hearts open. Which is just as well as he’d be unable to eat a whole one without a bottle or two of chilled carbonated water.

So, you have an undeserving wimp of a character as your focal point, how could you make it any worse? Make it look like someone has been on a Vimto and Highland Toffee binge and vomited all over the place. Yeah, throw some cobra’s on that, they’re cool! Yeah, right! Maybe in a 1990’s ‘I thought Karate Kid 3 was the best’ kind of way.

Basically it is a poor concept which looks like it has been put together by a bunch of blind monkeys.

To be honest Seymour, you should have stuck with your Jurassic Park gi and we’d all have been happier!

xmissuesx said...

Dear friend! I like what you've done with this design, but please, will you let me know when the man's design will be out? And do not worry - there are a lot of people that have not any scense for colours, just like you, and some of them are not even blind or 2-year old! So there's a future for you!

But really - I admire that through out this homo-colour design you're celebrating the homosexuals in our BJJ scene! Now they know someone is stanading for them! Or behind them? And don't worry - we're rally open in this scene, so we're not here to critisize you about your sex life!

And after all you can sleep with a smile, because somewhere someone with HB rashguard will be really smiling while being in a full guard and knowing loving close guards maybe wrong, but doing it with your HB rashguard really shows their attitude to the world.

P.S. And, yeah, everyone already knows that a honey badger with two snakes is just the metaphoric expression of your pink dreams, where two huge penises are dancing around your head. Ask Froid, dumbass!

It takes so much courage coming out in this mens world of BJJ, designing this homo-celebrating rashguard. I will wear it proud on 2nd of February!

Full guard is sweet!

kisses!

Mihail from Bulgaria

Michael said...

Rashguard designs oftentimes vary. Some are simple and clean, some are incredible (see Scramble's "Be Water") and then there is the "Honey-Badger" rashguard.

I generally prefer quirky/fun designs, however the Honey-Badger design is neither. It causes one to question the direction in which rash guards are now designed. The animal depicted, a honey badger, is a very unknown animal to many. It is a poor choice to represent fighting spirit, as many casual audiences will be unknown to the depicted animal.

Also the color selection is highly questionable, it mixes a strange hue of a deep mauve/violet and a strange warm palette. These colors generally do not mix well in any circumstance, let alone on a poorly designed rashguard.

Overall, the Honey-Badger rash guard is a failed attempt at attracting attention. It also is unable to push the design of future rashguards to come, and will be remembered as one of the most questionable rash-guard designs in existence.

xshaibax said...

Охуенный дизайн. Одев этот Рашгард вы будете делать такие страшные вещи как дабл армбар, флаинг траенгл и прочие страшные слова. Прибавляет +5 к выносливости и + 2 к атаке!!!
izya77@gmail.com Minsk,Belarus :)

darrell henwood said...

well this is the honey badger rashguard. what a honey badgers vomit looks like more like. its nice to see the old mma style of snakes along with other stupid picutres being used for the same time and then claiming an original design. as original as ready salted crisps perhaps. then of course theres all that purple, clearly the designer loves the fact hes a purple belt and this transitions into his work oh god people imagine when he reaches brown belt level but then again a rashguard that looks like turd would be better than this. hell a rashguard that was made of turd would be better than this. and then theres the fact that hes got his massive logo slapped onto it. honestly how does having a honey badger fightwear company but your logo is a meerkat theme even make sense. then hes signed it in chinese something about as connetcted to bjj as kung fu is for gods sake. lets face it who would like their own work that much that they not only put their logo on they sign it too. in massive chinese letters. as if the rashguard wouldnt already attract disdain from people with TASTE AND DIGNITY.
So to conclude the design is about as appealing as eating rotten fruit whilst letting kimbo slice punch you between mouthfuls. it looks stupid. its like a 5 yr old learened amauter arts and crafts and this is what he came up with. or she most likely given all that girly purple. absolute self indulgent nonsical designed rubbish.

J Sho said...

This rash-guard is the answer to a question that wasn't asked.

J Sho said...

This rash-guard fits like a glove... shame it doesn't fit like a rash-guard...

Murlan said...

The Honey badger. P4P the "baddest" animal on the Planet, The Honey Badger rash guard P4P the badest rash guard on the planet. It looks like the love child of piglet and mr snuffalupakis tripping out on LSD. Even the blind want to hit you for hurting there eyes.

KEVIN JR said...

THIS IS A GREAT EXAMPLE OF DRUNK CONFIDENCE. ITS CLEAR TO SEE THAT WHO EVER MADE THIS WAS UNDER THE INFLUENCE. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HEARD SOME ONE SAY THEY WANT TO BE A LIKE A BADGER WHEN THEY ROLL? A BADGER? MAN IF I EVER CAME ACROSS A BADGER ILL JUST SOCCER KICK THAT LITTLE SHIT. THEY WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER OFF PUTTING A UNICORN & RAINBOWS ON IT. AND WHATS UP WITH THOSE BOOTLEG LOOKING SNAKES? IS THIS A KNOCK OFF OF COBRINAHS BRAND? I THINK HE WOULD BE OFFENDED IF HE SAW THIS. AS A MATTER OF FACT ANY JIU JITSU INSTRUCTOR WOULD BE OFFENDED TO HAVE SOME ONE ON YOUR TEAM WEAR THIS. THIS IS AS BAD AS THE JERSEY SHORE/ TACKY AFFLICTION MMA STYLE CLOTHING WITH LAME AS CROSSES, BARBED WIRE AND ,BRASS KNUCKLES. WHATS NEXT? V -NECK RASHGUARD?I KNOW ITS NOT GOOD TO INTIMIDATE PEOPLE WITH CRAZY GEAR. BUT I WOULDNT WANT PEOPLE LAUGHING AT ME WHENEVER I GOT ON THE MAT. THE ONLY BENEFIT OF THIS IS THAT PEOPLE WILL TAKE YOU LIGHTLY SINCE YOU HAVE A BADGER ON YOUR RASHGUARD. THIS RASH GUARD WILL ONLY BE A HOT TOPIC IN THE KIDS CLASS, AND THEY WILL DEFINATELY LOSE RESPECT FOR YOU AS WELL.

Zen Mojo said...

The Meerkatsu Honey Badger Rashguard makes the women on all those "Real Housewives" reality shows seem incredibly nice, wholesome, classy, and just the type of "girl next door" one could spend a blissful eternity with.

One can only hope that its Apple like "reality distortion field" will so befuddle and bemuse your next opponent that they are easily submitted.

Please excuse me. I have a compelling urge to wash my eyes out with FightSoap.

Keith Savage
Nashville, TN

Casey 'Gracie' Lee said...

The Honey Badger Rashguard, the one rashguard that is wrong for you. This hideous looking rashguard offers a unique looking design, perfectly arranged for those looking to be humiliated on the mat. It presents a mediocre looking honey badger in the centre, sporting a fantastically horrible middle hair parting. Within its jaws, it holds not only one, but two, two headed snakes, how ridiculous is that? Amazingly ridiculous. This is all surrounded by a shiny grape coloured background, specifically chosen from the paint application, clearly to display the, not so awfully drawn images.
If you're looking to work hard, earn money and waste it on a one of a kind rashguard, then this is for you, it will surely not be worth it.
It doesn't matter what race, gender or age you are, this rashguard will do the job in not not complimenting you at all.
To summarise, a rashguard that would be recommended for no one, especially those looking to excel in the sport of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu.
Go on, look further.

Anonymous said...

[In your best Clarkson voice]


Honey Badger Rash Guard Obituary: An objective and fair review.


Those who are remembered in this world can fall into two categories.

The first are those who in life contribute; their humble offerings resonate through time and their memory lives long in the heart of all those they have touched.

The second are those who are remembered for their shear cruelty; their utter disregard for humanity and all things held dear by mankind.

If you were to smash these two categories together in a metaphysical CERN you’d create something truly horrific.

A monster bellowing “# I did it myyyyy wayyyyyyy!” A self indulgent chimera who believes he is “moving things on” and is “being creative”.

Seymour Yang (revealed by his probation officer to really be Simon Bang, a 43 year old assistant biscuit manufacturing technician whose only link to the Far East is a GCSE project on Korea - which he failed to complete) is such a being.

He waxes lyrical about BJJ but it is all myth. Like a dirty “Walter Mitty”, in truth he has to sign a register which strictly prohibits him from having close contact with anyone not sterilised and wearing a full suit of armour.

His honey badger rash guard is to martial arts apparel what the crotchless pants are to public swimming.

The colours and motifs have been known to put Oscar and Lottery winners into a catatonic state. The garment could not appear worse if you were to put your eyeballs into a food processor and then pour the liquid back into your sockets.

All that said the rash guard is innovative. Forget “anti microbial layers” and “anti fungal treatments”. ‘Seymour’ has fashioned (in the loosest possible sense of the term) a garment which is 100% guaranteed style, class and taste phobic.

Some have criticised his use of Chinese characters as haphazard and meaningless. He rebuts such claims and asserts they have deep significance and meaning. I cannot tell a lie and confirm that they indeed do. I showed it to the chef at my local takeaway and he clearly understood it...but I told him I was happily married and had never had such inclinations!

Honey Badger Rash Guard - R.I.P.

Che-Gul Nawaz Hussain

Anonymous said...

If this design was on toilet paper, i'd use my hand.

Andrew Downie (BJJ Artists)

The Martinator said...

If Julian Clary was a rash guard, this would be it....

Martin Eyre (Bjj Obsessed)

Casey 'Gracie' Lee said...

Oops, some grammatical mistakes, apologies, but you get the gist of what I'm saying, the rashguard is poo.

Casey 'Gracie' Lee said...

"I just called...to say..."

Stevie Wonder wouldn't wear it.

Jan H. said...

Dear Mr Meerkatsu,

we would like to inform you that we can´t sell your Honey Badger Rashguard, because your design is against the good taste of the people in the world.
We can only sell this...thing if we censor it.
Our proposal: We remove the double-head-cobras (because it´s not normal), we remove the honey badger (what kind of animal, yes it´s the fearlesst but what can it in other aspects) and then we remove the colour and put it in black.
The end: a normal black rashguard with your patch. So the normal people will buy it.

We hope you can live with this decision.
Please let us know if you are agreed with our proposal and then you can sell your new rashguard.
If you don´t agreed with it you can´t sell it and we will send a complaint to the government!

Best regards,
your nightmare

:-)

Polish Hammer said...

The Honey Badger Rash Guard is for the BJJ enthusiast that does not care about taking out a few Cobrinha wanna-bes in nogi competition. Going into competition can feel like going into a house of bees - but nothing can stop the Honey Badger when he's rolling! Whether you're in 50/50, closed or open guard - in this rash guard you see a heel hook and you don't even care... you just take it! If the leg lock game doesn't suit you, slap on a RNC or guillotine so when your opponent is just laying there you can tell the ref "look at this sleepy f***." At the end of the day, wearing this rash guard you will be on a podium saying "Thanks for the medal, stupid!"

Mike Miskowiak - Hudson, WI

Brendan said...

26 October 2011

Mrs. Snake
128 Savannah Drive


Seymour Yang / Meerkatsu Inc. / Tatami Fightwear / Armourtech Inc.
1 Shaftsbree Lane
The land of hobbits and Elves, England

RE: Your Honey Badger Rashguard

Dear Mr. Meerkatsu,

Enclosed is a copy of the lawsuit that I filed against you in English court on the 25th of October, 2011. Currently, the Pretrial Conference is scheduled for 26 October at 5am in Chicago, Illinois. The case number is 44-1032-47.55.

The lawsuit was filed due to the utter lack of class from your company. When someone is the victim of a crime, in this case murder, it is simply their worst nightmare to have a secondary party (see parties named above) glorifying that act. To have to live every day seeing an image of your client, Mr. Badger, killing my husband (now deceased), in beyond reason. In my country, slander (as well as libel), is illegal. For you to smear our families good name, as well as our race and ethnicity, for the sake of selling a vomit purpled-coloured (I threw the extra ‘u’ in there just for you and your dreadful language), is despicable. Never mind the fact that your drawing of my husband looks like a small child’s scribblings.

I have fully investigated my rights in this matter. Under the doctrine of “your rashguard looks like a baby threw up on an old t-shirt,” as seen in Engelhardt v Gravens (Mo) 281 SW 715, 719, I may presume that you have not fully researched due process in this case. I have copies of the certified letters from the President of the United States and the Queen of England stating:

“I’m sorry. I couldn’t stop laughing when I first saw it. I thought you were joking. People are actually going to wear that? It looks like an old newspaper draped over a homeless person. Seriously, I would rather wear an Osama Bin Laden rasghuard while getting punched in the face by Allistair Overeem than wear that piece of crap.” – President Barack Obama

“Oh Heavens! What Is that thing? It looks like he had a seizure while drawing it!” – Her Majesty the Queen

I am prepared to bring these to court on October 26th. Also, under the Crappy Symmetrical Art Reporting Act, the disputed item may not appear for sale until my case is decided.

This will proceed in court until I have successfully proven to a judge that your pile of refuse, I mean rashguard, must be removed from the market. I will also be aggressively pursuing the full judgment that I can get against you and that awful, hate-mongering, slandering, poorly-drawn, misaligned (its not even centered properly) article of clothing. And what are those random red scribbling on the arm? I translated them and they said, “The guy who made this is an idiot.” I take that back. You should keep them.

I have already won a similar lawsuit against Randall. Enclosed is a copy of that settlement. I will agree to a similar settlement with you and the above-named parties if you contact me before October 26th.

Otherwise, I’ll see you and that appalling shirt in court.

I look forward to your response.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Snake
SSN# 123-45-6789
Attachment included

BrianC said...

What a lovely looking rashguard! Fierce! as my hair stylist is wont to say. It is about time that somebody made rashguards for the tween girl market. My 9 year old daughter would be very happy to wear this under her pink with purple hearts Gi to non contact Tiequando to prevent nip chaffing.

I am not sure on a couple of things with the rash guard though. The first is the skunk on the front, it looks like it is having it's Time of the Month? The second is that the snakes appear to be double ended? I hope that isn't a reference to something else double ended that you can use cheek to cheek? The third is that it seems to have Meerkatsu written on the front, I have heard that is nasty street talk for somebody with a small penis? Is that correct or have I misheard?

twitterhelp said...

If Herpes and Gonorrhoea had a nice candle lit steak dinner, followed by a few glasses of wine topped off with a drug & drink fuelled evening of passion listening to the sultry tones of Barry White; this rashguard here is what would be spawned 9 months later....

William Wayland said...

ZOMG HnYbAdGER RasHie sux, The Designer is such a Noob, whyare the hny badgrs brains showing, teeth r too small and eyez no menacing enough.

It feels like BUrLap Agains my skin and the color is teh gay. Overhyped don't believe payed off reviews from meerkatsu frinds

0/10 would not wear, would not wear

HnYbAdGER RasHie sux

Ronin said...

Well having read some of the reviews its time to start mine.
As with most rash guards it is very bright, this doesnt sound much like a criticism, and its not if you like to look like a giant bruise on someones thigh, it looks like a visually impaired persons attempt at paint by numbers, having been tricked by someone else changing the numbers on the paint pots, the cobras look like they have been disturbed during feeding time, and appear to be ready to yak up the mouse or rat they have partly digested. The honey badger (or giant weasel) as i know it is obviously very upset about being used on this item of clothing, why honey badger it doesnt even eat honey, the rash guard is tailored for men, this leaves out the obvious advantages when women wear them, as it will fail to hug those important curves, also its a size large your giving away, what good is that to me when im a medium, and i dont mean i sit on Blackpool prom telling fortunes, cos if i did i would have seen this design coming and avoided it offending my eyes, anybody who buys one of these rashguards will be in for a surprise when they receive something that looks like one of Laurence Llewellyn Bowens cast offs, all it is missing are the ruffled sleeves and cravat. So the long and short of it is if you want to mince around the mat looking like a crazy moving living color explosion then get in your order before they all sell out, hopefully they will all be donated to unicef and the only time we will catch a glimpse of them is when Lenny Henry is doing an update from Africa and we see someone in the back ground wearing on, it will make a change to the usual Arsenal football shirt.
P.S. My son loves it, he is now homeless as i can not live with someone with absolutely no taste whatsoever.

Two Seperate Gorillas said...

I think the rash would look better.

David Tedora, London

NadzAsyraf said...

As childish as it gets. You can win in a children art contest with this but urgh.. I'll stop now.

PMoran said...

This may be the greatest collection of "Haters gone Hate" ever. I think the next rashguard should be a troll design. It's hard for trolls to troll trolls. Surely people must realize that the HB Rashgward has power in it. It takes a lot to get such creative, and lengthy, hate.

D Reid said...

What a load of absolute crap. What an insult to the BJJ Community someone is, to create such an awful piece of clothing. It looks like something my son would wear to bed!

Yeah, I'll just draw a badger and a snake, get Armourtech to make me a few and I'll rip off a few suckers! - Better luck next time you self scented pratt, I wouldn't be paid to wear this dross, I don't even believe a UFC Fighter would endorse this, even if you paid him more than his fight purse for the night! Who on earth (apart from the selfish a hole that made it) would want to be associated with this piece of tosh?

Whoever made this clearly needs to stick to fucking doodling cartoons. What on earth have animals got to do with BJJ?, sweet FA. Just looking at the piece of tat winds me up - I might actually order one, (from the 'designer' himself) clean myself with it (after I've been to the toilet) - and then ask him for a refund & send it back.

Die Honey Badger, just die! I would love to have a roll with Honey Badger - you little piece of shit! I will be wearing my Venum rashie, and I promise, you are not waking up after tasting my venom. You little fucker.

JoeClark said...

I won't waste my not so valuable time writing a proper review of this turd. Instead, I will write a few gut reactions to this worthless piece of garbage:

Hot damn with this rashie I’m gonna be the best looking thing in the trailer park!

This product is Anti-Microbial and Anti-Fungal because any decent Microbe or fungus wouldn’t be seen dead on THIS turd.

This rashguard is so ugly that it scared the shit out of the toilet.

This thing is so ugly the toilet refused to flush it.

I wouldn’t use this to wipe my arse. That is how you say it in England right?

Why does the skunk look so angry? Because some dumbarse parted his hair down the middle and put him on this piece of shit. Now that stinks!

I had the Chinese letters translated and it stands for “You can’t polish a turd.”

Awesome, I just found my new Halloween outfit. What am I going as you ask? A douchebag and this rashie is perfect!

I wore this thing to a haunted house and they gave me a job application

This thing is so ugly it can make a blind man cry

This thing is so ugly it made the dog sh!t itself.

The two headed snakes look like a carnival side show. In fact this turd looks like something a Carni would wear.

Is that a tear in the snakes’ eye?

This thing is so ugly that it made Joel Osteen curse when he saw it!

Even Big Nog thinks it's ugly and lets face it, he knows ugly! (um just kidding Big Nog seriously you are a handsome man, really!)

This rashguard is so ugly that when I threw it on the ground, it killed the roaches.

This thing makes Lady Gaga’s meat dress look like Armani!

The Honey Badger may not give a sh!t about much but I heard he’s pissed about this!

This thing is so ugly it hurt the Honey Badgers feelings.

This rashie is so ugly that you can use IT to beat the ugly stick!

Liberace called, he wants his rashguard back.

I had to use my cell phone to submit this cause when I’m wearing this rash guard I can’t even turn on the computer (get it? TURN ON? Cause I’m so unsexy with this thing on, moron!)

Remember Seymour, opinions are like arseholes: yours stinks so keep it to yourself!

Anonymous said...

I have a fight coming up and have been trying to cut some weight. It was lucky I came across this atrocity as it acts as a very good hunger suppressant. I urge meerkatsu to leave the "fashion" industry and enter the nutrition one

M Cortese

Marco Wiederkehr said...

Design looks like a girl who gives her her BF a BJ after she just found out he cheated on her. Result will be similarly painful to the eye cancer the Rashguardcolours caused.

Meerkatsu said...

***** THIS CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED ****

Big big thank you to everyone who took part. I really enjoyed reading all the entries - a lot of you wrote some hugely withering and yet laugh out loud critiques. Some of you wrote some very poinsonous reviews that made me wonder how much of it you actually meant!!!

I narrowed down my favourites to four and couldn't decide so I read themout loud to my wife - she is ultimate arbiter of all things in my life and she decided the funniest was...


Brendan, which is Mrs Snake lawyers letter!!!

Well done Brendon, can you email me your postal address and I will send out the Large HB rashguard out today for ya!

Once again, thank you to everyone who took part, sorry but I only had one prize.

 

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